words that maybe the last

just need a place to say what in my mind the only place is here

what the meaning of to love someone
is it to be with the person
is it to make sure the person live better and is happy
or is it share the up and down


the ans i feel is all
if it is possible

life have been very sian as my day is my night
if anyone understand that
anyway a few more days to go
will be off to china haizzz
ppl go oversea are overjoy but i did not have that kind of feeling at all more like uneasy about it



in a person life there many be alot of ppl u are close to but there are very few who know u well
there are some who u like n care
there are some who u know only can be friends
there are some who u thought u know them well but instead no

there are a fews friends i say i will alway be there for them no matter what happen or where i am , up to now if i remember correct is 4 person if i am not wrong
only 1 person who if i cant really forget or say i cant do what i used to do for u unless if i am no longer around
the only one who if i lie/hurt to will be something i never plan to do unless if i know that my time is up and no longer can i be there to care and to proctive u anymore
to hurt the one u care the pain will be more on urself if the person u care mean something to u
for that i gone through it which i dont plan to do so again

i will keep the promise that i hold to u that which i do not plan to break at all even thought there are time where i know u cant stand me too

at the least i hope if really the unexpect happen , i can only say i am sorry no longer can i keep the promise i hold to u . even thought this message there are no chance u can see it at all which i know u favour to speak face to face if there are things to be say .

just want to say u are still the only one who i love and care the most for more than myself and the only one who i miss most and worry the most for , the things i say i mean it
even thought i dont know u feel the same or not as i cant blame u if u are not as love or to like a person cant be force

feel lost

trust is something i dont have anymore to the around me
should i say idont know who to trust now
funny but it is real did not know that

life
is like a joke to me
but then i will change that
simple will never be in me anymore that for sure

life
is not that simple any more
or should i say ppl around me are no longer the same

anyway my feeling is cold did not plan to care too much for anyone as i did feel there a need to anyway
who care what i think or feel

....... to the world
..... .... did not want to give a ......