dreams

2010-01-04T22:57:00.001-08:00

it is true to say the more u put in the more pain it will cause when it fail

there are no return for the care n love a person put in when he show to the person

as there a saying if the person do not have feeling for u no matter how much he do at the end of day she will not feel it at all

let it be then

16 days to go to show if she is right about a friend of mine if she is then it will show that nothing will show a friendship worth other than money as it will show the true color of the person .

2009-12-23T12:35:00.000-08:00

one more day to christmas wish everyone who read my blog a happy holiday

i wish there is someone to company through this day but i dont there will be anyone want to go through this special day with me

thinking i been overcaring for a friend to the level i dont know where i stand as in what am i to her close friend ask me so are u 2 together , my ans is no as that how i feel from her

but what u do is more than a friend i tell her i admit i like her i want to be with her i want her to be my girl but if there is someone better n she is happy with him i will wish her the best n will pray for her like i do everyday . as i believe loving someone what matter is she is happy n health that is more important than being with me but not happy . i will also move away when she is taken to be fair to her bf

this will be a promise for 2010

i hope i will be able to do alot better in the coming year as i want to catch up with wat i lose n want to gain ground of it . want to get a car at least n move on the job if it cant give me wat i want

that the last one

2008-05-16T12:42:00.000-07:00

just to say that from now on pl go to instead http://cyq1922.blogspot.com/

carry on

Thanks i give to u

2008-05-01T13:43:00.001-07:00

each day i live now is counted as extra for me as somehow i really feel i am very luck to be here writing maybe even some of my close feel the same way too
that why i somehow wanted to show more caring to those i care

A day here is a day away from u
A day i learn from here i learn more about u
A day i care for others is what u show me through that secs i have in u

so i thanks u for letting me live again

A prayer each day is how i feel to get to know u better

Give thanks to u above us all

11/04/2008

2008-02-27T15:38:00.000-08:00

Seen like it will be a hard year ahead for me
as it seen like no matter wat i do i have to be careful as it seen anything that can go wrong will go wrong so just in case any happen i will check all items before sending them to the customers
if not will be wasting oil again as it getting more XXX

haizz

i alway believe that everyone can chose which path they want to take but it seen mine i cant really chose at all haizz

life is ..

2007-11-08T16:22:00.001-08:00

"when everything that needed to be done is done then it is time to say
goodbye "

when the reason to stay n stand by u are gone
wat do u expect me to do ?
Stay?
Go?

most ppl will say stay as i need u
but is it the real ans that really mean it
only u will know

when a person is alone
where he/she cant find a reason to call someone he/she care
who can he/she find ?

there are a total of 4 ppl all are female that i give the same promise to
that is no matter wat happen where i am i will alway be there for u through anytime that have up n down in ur life just give me a sms / call n i will be there no matter wat
but now i realize that not everyone of them or anyone of the 4 need that kind of promise from me

for some i may seen like a help-line when in needed of help
but who do i will to when i just needed someone who i care / love to listen to wat i have in my heart ?

ans NIL

funny as there are one who say u can share with me when u are down or when u needed a listening ear but in the end i did not dare to share with u as it is no longer the same when u made that promise to me
but i never blame u as it is fate
no longer i feel that close to u as it feel more like i am moving away from u as time pass
which is a fact that i dont think u know
there are time that i tell u something that got 2 meaning but i know that of all of wat i say u maynot remember wat i say the last min as time are no longer the same
maybe to say
in the first place
i was not even in the pic at all just a person who u can fell back to when there are no one that are free at that time
but at that time i alway skip a heart beat when i seen it is u who call
but .....

the only thing i can say is
u are one of 2 person who can turn my world upside down
my job is done for u as all i can
to 598

the day u make a guy drop the first tears is the day the guy's heart die
dont think u will know anyway

in front of u
u alway seen a person who have no problem or a person who problem are never mean much in u
cant blame u
as i was not the one from day 1
i know u

when a guy help u do not mean he ask for a return

he only wanted u to feel happy that all that he ask

sometime

there alot of things he wanted to share

but when see u all worry are left behind

as he did not want to worry u

all he wanted when he know in ur heart

he is only a normal friend who u never have feeling for

u are happy

a start maybe a ending 2

2007-10-02T23:42:00.000-07:00

There are times when there are things happen the first u wanted to share with is the one who u wanted to be with
but there are times where it is no longer possible at all as the time n ppl change due to different matter
still no matter how it is still matter to me is u are safe n sound even thought the story will no longer have anything to do with me

ppl wonder how come i got 2 different blog n words are total no link at time
all i can say is because link to different group of ppl read it

to be .......

2007-07-21T13:07:00.000-07:00

nowaday it take 1month to come up with wat i want to fill my blog but also dont think much ppl will come in to read about it anyway

in a hour time will be on my way to pick up eunice up to send her to airport as she going for a holiday with angela

life not going to be the same from then on as all things have to face it no matter i like it or not n no place to hide . being real in facing the life alone ya for the first time i admint it as noone to go to or hide . in a place where the high u study for get u further . haiz i am sick of it , dont have a ideas who to look to or lent a ear from .....

The one who i trust the most n care the most i no longer i can say i really trust wat she say anymore . as i feel i no longer feel i know u that much anymore since that trip

somehow / somewhere TWK who all know seen to lost as all things do not seen that simple anymore, someone tell me before never trust a person too much as u never know the real reason for him or her to be ur friend
i have to say Sorry for not listening to u
i also would to say Sorry to Mr Cheng a person who bring hope n like a father/ family member to me as i never get the chance to say goodbye for the last time as well as to say sorry for not turning up for the 2 outing
i still remember the dream i have about u
how i wish u are still around. Sir

I want to tell all i am sorry for the time being i am not able face anything as i still have not overcome my 2 problems
hope those who really trust me as friends can understand

A promise make for life

2007-06-28T16:20:00.000-07:00

maybe i really have let go of it
funny to say that as never really thought that i am able to do it at all
anyway been busy with all kind of things so that not to think about it

but anyway only few know the whole pic
haiz

a friend ask me wat is love n how do u tell someone have hold a touch for u n if a n b are very gf but if a tell b about how he/she feel for him/her how will he/she react

my ans is depend on the person as everyone react different way

as how i feel for the same person may not be the same at all

u still got a place in my heart

to be .........................

2007-05-18T00:12:00.000-07:00

Friday
15.17pm

sunny afternoon

Sick

in mind as well in body

haiz

seen like still have no ideas what lie ahead for me to do

someone tell me ......................

Thoughts

2007-04-28T11:01:00.000-07:00

Maybe i am a joke
which i thought i can be the one
haiz
maybe i set it abit over myself

maybe in many ppl eyes i know everything
i dont need any help at all
but there are times where each one will feel down haiz

the close friend who alway say is it worth the effect u put into
will anyone at the end of the day say thanks
which never was my intend to get that when i do it
but there are things that i hope i would hear too just like others
haiz

maybe i just a joke

to trust is easy but to do both then it is hard

i can wait but is the wait get me anyway i dont know
is it at all

Promise i make i will keep then in my heart hope that i will not break any
but if then mean that i will be looking after for somone else then u may see the last sight of me
as trust is lost

simple is the words i used to say myself
after the china trip
trust is not really matter
haiz
to worry yet noone care then why bother if it is just a joke it turn out to be

the load is getting heavy by days
i losing the joy or the smile i used to carry

the meaning is what

"cold as my heart can be it is no longer the warm that it is
tears i used to drop for ones i care it no longer fell as it is drying up
feeling i used to hold on to maybe just a .......... to the person

dont tell me u know me as i know u better than u see me to
dont tell me u understand me as i can see ur thought without u saying it out
dont tell me u care as i can sense what is real and wat is a lie

if seeing me have to lie then i will say thanks but no thanks u take care then
if seeing me have to hid then u may meet me the last time as ...........

maybe my feeling is nothing compare to
then i will end the friendship as i see no point carry on "

from the book of ... ... ......

Winning habits

2007-04-17T02:22:00.001-07:00

lesson learn from the book winning habits
it is a book worth reading
spend 3 hours reading at mac yesterday night and understand the meaing it hold behind it

the way to go

Point 1
Be fist on, last off , and add extra value

which mean attitude in the things we do in must be the same even if the te big details are been done as there are small detail that need to follow up
remeber that it's results-based rather than activity-based

Point 2

Never trade results for excuses

meaning when a goal uset out to do no matter how hard it is or how long it will take make sure that u finish it no matter what never find an excuses for it

when facing the problem think of there's no excuse and then ding whatever was necessary to achieve wha u had set out t do

Point 3

Solve problems in advance

"Every move's a move, and everything you do makes a difference. But not every difference you make is intended. Or even positive, for that matter. More often than not, when ppl decide to do something either to implement a new decision or to solve a problm they create unintended consequences . Those unintended consequences are new problems "

by troubleshooting your action plan befre you implement them

Point 4

Alway make those around u look good

.......

away and hope to be back

2007-04-04T14:04:00.000-07:00

will be away for the next 6 day
will be back to keep the promise i made to u just now
will be missing u all
take care my friends

words that maybe the last

2007-03-31T11:49:00.000-07:00

just need a place to say what in my mind the only place is here

what the meaning of to love someone
is it to be with the person
is it to make sure the person live better and is happy
or is it share the up and down

the ans i feel is all
if it is possible

life have been very sian as my day is my night
if anyone understand that
anyway a few more days to go
will be off to china haizzz
ppl go oversea are overjoy but i did not have that kind of feeling at all more like uneasy about it

in a person life there many be alot of ppl u are close to but there are very few who know u well
there are some who u like n care
there are some who u know only can be friends
there are some who u thought u know them well but instead no

there are a fews friends i say i will alway be there for them no matter what happen or where i am , up to now if i remember correct is 4 person if i am not wrong
only 1 person who if i cant really forget or say i cant do what i used to do for u unless if i am no longer around
the only one who if i lie/hurt to will be something i never plan to do unless if i know that my time is up and no longer can i be there to care and to proctive u anymore
to hurt the one u care the pain will be more on urself if the person u care mean something to u
for that i gone through it which i dont plan to do so again

i will keep the promise that i hold to u that which i do not plan to break at all even thought there are time where i know u cant stand me too

at the least i hope if really the unexpect happen , i can only say i am sorry no longer can i keep the promise i hold to u . even thought this message there are no chance u can see it at all which i know u favour to speak face to face if there are things to be say .

just want to say u are still the only one who i love and care the most for more than myself and the only one who i miss most and worry the most for , the things i say i mean it
even thought i dont know u feel the same or not as i cant blame u if u are not as love or to like a person cant be force

feel lost

2007-03-28T11:11:00.000-07:00

trust is something i dont have anymore to the around me
should i say idont know who to trust now
funny but it is real did not know that

life
is like a joke to me
but then i will change that
simple will never be in me anymore that for sure

life
is not that simple any more
or should i say ppl around me are no longer the same

anyway my feeling is cold did not plan to care too much for anyone as i did feel there a need to anyway
who care what i think or feel

....... to the world
..... .... did not want to give a ......

time

2007-02-25T10:23:00.001-08:00

how time pass
it seen so fast that all time change again
but then time never did stop at all so no surpise at all
anyway fail to send a friend off on friday
sorry

as i was having something on at that time but wanted to but then it was alway sad to see a friend go but then that is part of life

a friend in need is a friend indeed

past days

2007-02-11T02:18:00.000-08:00

funny seen like i cant get to sleep before 2
anyway
have a great few days out with my friends who i did not see for past 5 month or even more
maybe can say is i am more like myself with them than i am with my other friends
maybe due to see less more to share or know what thinking but guess not

kind of miss them when i see them as .........

lesson learn do anything but dont hurt to the ones u care as that is not what u wanted to do in the first place
try not to show ur feeling as it may affect others too
learn to let go if it mean that it will be better for both person
learn that things u bought as surpise maynot be something she/he may use at all
alway do what u think is right after u think it through and know that it will not hurt anyone
to care may seen easy but to do it take alot more than u know it
to say the true feeling maybe a good at the least u know what the person think but then it depend if the person have the same feeling too for u as it may also mean a end to a friendship if handle wrongly
but that may happen to me only haha

too many things but too little time anyway
i plan to write letter about the thought i have in the few person i sent it too
be surpise as it may be u
....
that all

bur bur bur

2007-02-07T09:02:00.000-08:00

maybe when u have everything u kind of taking everythig for granted
only when u start to lose it then u understand how much it mean to u

but what the point saying that now

"dark is no longer that lonely anymore at the very least it will alway by ur side through the night"

maybe through that ppl will learn to be more open as the sayin go on

fear

2007-02-05T02:28:00.000-08:00

my sight is not getting any better dont know what is going on
did not tell anyone about it as they have problems themself
wanted to share with a friend but did not see the person for the past 2 week maybe it is time i should just say that it man no point

haiz
bur is the word i used for sight i have
hope that it will recover

heart is so hurt by things that happen just wish that i can just drop die

just want to say this if it happen to be the last post i write before i gone as we do not know what the next sec will happen

there are 3 person who i will do anything for just to let u know that even if i am not around i will alway look after u from where ever i am u will alway be in my heart,
as each one of u mean something to me
it may be love friendship or someone i care alot for
that all i will alway be there for u

what left are tears

2007-01-05T08:50:00.000-08:00

tears that dry up with blood with it
maybe i should have been blind from young yet i got a second chance
which is 6 out of 6
but i say so what
as in the end u just a ITE person
haizzzz

no matter how much i try
no matter how hard i do
no matter how much i give

result : Fail

funny did not thought that with hardwork and determine can still fail
maybe i belong to wrong period of time or should i say i should not have taken the first step to love someone

i have to agree i do not have anything what ppl say 5c are maybe i lose my only c which is the 6 c

today speak to my sis and i tell her 2007 maybe a very lonely year for me onward as i dont think anyone will remember my birthday anymore and that i may have spend it by myself

where wind show the way

2006-12-06T08:17:00.000-08:00

when the fact is out
when all sign is there showing who is right

maybe it is time to move on

the joy do not seen to be there anymore

as it is no longer what i see it is anymore

no longer as what it used to

the first and last time to say what is left are broken promise who are going to be broken

the smile that used to have when i see u are now replace by fear of not be able to cheer u up

thought

2006-12-01T09:20:00.000-08:00

have a dream today
it seen so real and that i did not even know why i feel that i miss those time.
A time where sport is part of my life

there was a person who i look up and alway find if things dont go right for me who i speak to
a person who is more than just a teacher, coach but also a friend

dont know why i dream of him
but can say is that
Sometime it is not how we spend the time
but it is who we spend it with
maybe i broke the promise that i will be there plus i decide not to remember what have happen to him still today

someone who i will call to see how things coming up for him

I just wish that i could say Sorry and say thanks and goodbye to him

no matter how time pass i will remember the person

Tears

2006-10-16T08:20:00.001-07:00

never know how much u mean to me to the day u are gone
i will still say i will alway be there no matter where i am

Tears

2006-10-16T08:20:00.000-07:00

never know how much u mean to me to the day u are gone
i will still say i will alway be there no matter where i am

Passing Away of part of me

2006-10-10T21:34:00.000-07:00

sometime when u hurt someone it not only hurt the person but it also hurt myself if get what i mean by that.

who right / wrong

noone will be able to tell at all

but i still feel that i will still be there for u

even if u dont need me anymore

WK may i will miss u

No Promises

2006-09-12T21:24:00.000-07:00

2 down and 1 more paper to go
somehow can say that this should be the one of the worse exam i gone through

yesterday my mei ask me what grade do i think i can get for my yesterday paper which she give me 2 choice A/B which i know in my heart A is so far away from me so i tell her B but i also say No Promises that i can get that

can say is any promise i made this year no longer have any value anymore as it do have the same value tat i used to held on to

i been tinking alot this 2 days , was wondering how life will turn out if i can just put all my feeling to a place where i can just lock up in some part of my mind. maybe then i can say that me u used to know i guess

this year i hurt many friends tat i know many years which i wish that i can go back to time to change it . somehow my mind is clearer now but for how longer i do not know so while i still clear in mind i will write out what i think
3 target i set myself tis 3 month
learn to let go even if it hurt
treat everyone same
................................

I don't want to run away,

I want to stay forever,

thru Time and Time..

No promises

thought

2006-08-26T20:42:00.000-07:00

Sometime it is not how long we know each other that mean alot but it is what what happen during the time we get to know which one that matter as in i can know u for a year but still we can only be normal friend but i can know a person less than 6 month but somehow it is what happen during the 6 month that will effect the friendship . It is only when it time to say goodbye that the feeling of close friends we been start to get in

a Person who put others before him will feel more than he put himself before others

Words

2006-08-22T02:36:00.000-07:00

Sometime the person that destroy all the good work turnout to be the himself.
e.g when the person put someone in the first place where everything he see will alway thing will this help her in anyway, it seen right but then have u ever thought how the person feel of the things that u do in the first place. As in wait for the reply before calling the person no matter how longer it take the person to reply . alway look on the bright side no matter what as trust is needed in all things.
Something when saying Sorry cant help at all as it is not the first time it happen. can only say i let patience run out when i should have hold on to the faith and trust instead of rushing

what a let down i am causing more trouble for her instead
this month i never seen to be able to do anything right anymore
haiz just wish that she will reply me

Faith

2006-08-18T08:27:00.000-07:00

Faith is something that it is easy say than done as in
I can say I have faith in u in the things that u do
but in another way it can also mean that there not much faith that why I say

A friendship is something that faith as well as trust is build on it cant be rush as a friendship that is rush will not last long
there are things that happen in the past that change the path we take which we will regret

of .

maybe if there a way to go back time i guess i will not be able to get to know a number of ppl which i do not know it is good or bad . take it for an instead if ihave work hard during my sec time i may not have a problem of what i am going to do after i finish study but now even if i finish ITE the job i get may not even last me a month

haiz

taken for grant or should i say i a fool in love life i guess which ..........................

love someone do not mean that the person have to be the one with u but also can mean that she is happy , no worry

maybe it is a joke at the start when ppl say never start something that u do not know what result it will bring with it . but if at the start i never take any risk i will not get my driving licence . i will not join tennis.

to care for someone mean that the person have a place in their heart . which no matter where they are , i will also look out for them .

THE PROMISE

2006-08-17T10:17:00.000-07:00

sometime worry too much

thinking too much

it will not help the matter at all

have faith & trust in the person

i only have trust in u as that how everything should go by

3 days of runnning made me clear that something still need time to settle it no matter what

23 years of my life i only start to feel that there someone really i care alot more than myself

but then will it turn out how i wish it will remain as a ? mark

I can only say is

NO MATTER WHAT HAPPEN OR WHERE U ARE I WILL BE THERE NO MATTER WHERE I AM WHAT I AM DOING THAT I PROMISE U

Dream p2

2006-08-14T07:20:00.000-07:00

Maybe all the things that happen at any part of the time is being written somewhere , i cant say that i am still the same person as everything will change as well as move on but for now i can say is my feeling is still the same

Dreams

2006-08-13T02:12:00.000-07:00

Gone to watch firework but the story is not at there but is before as well as after
but first the Question
someone ask me how did u stand her when she scold u with no reason / did not give a dam how u care or feel

i only got 1 ans cause i like her no matter what she do even thought there a cut in my heart with the words she say that time which up to now did not heal at all
I only care is she is happy and enjoy the time even if it mean i will no longer be around by her side
maybe i am a fool to like someone who may not even have feeling for me , what life is guess and the funny part is i am not angry with her if that is the fact i can only blame myself that i come in her life at the wrong time

Promise

2006-07-26T08:51:00.000-07:00

Funny title i have as used to keep all the promise i made yet i seen like i breaking them one by one
kind of moving away from everyone i know . somehow feel bein alone will be better for me at this time . will still be the same person who listen to what ppl have to share with me of their problem
but ...............

back to the same ans want to share
all the choice u made will change the things around no matter how small u think it is

"get used by ppl " it depend on how u look at it as if everything a person do is to gain something for himself and did not bother how the ppl around him/her feeling then i can say he/she is is using ppl around him

as in what the point of win when there are no one with u at the end
someone care for u that why he will alway sms u yet .....
maybe in someone or in many ppl he is just a part of person who just happen to enter that part
their life will just disappear as time pass by

seen so hard to know how ppl feel anymore

haiz i am tired of life

left with 4 days

2006-07-18T00:11:00.000-07:00

haiz going back to school next monday that fast
maybe it not a bad thing i guess
gain & lose is just next to each other

as how to determine how much u win when u did not know how much u lose
there no way a person can win all the way unless / may he/she put in the effort in all she/he does

A mask is easy to wear yet in real life everyone is wearing one as the fear of being hurt is there
what goes around come around

thought 2

2006-07-06T01:01:00.000-07:00

Gone to airport to send a good friend off
feeling sad as well as happy as in she will be away , happy as in there will be a good doc in the future for sure
duno know what to say that day wanted to say sorry that did not manage to send her off the first time she left
haizz

too many thing still hve not come a ans to solve it
haiz
Problem person nowaday i guess i have become

wonder how is my friend over there now

A Dream

2006-05-03T07:10:00.000-07:00

it seen that things alway happen for a reason
no matter how it is time still go on

change is something that can not be undone but just think about it
if u say the person change or is it you are the one that change